Sigh
I stared at that page for a while, wondering what the title for this post should be and that's what I came up with.
I feel spent, I think that's what it is. Family visits here, are more emotionally charged and harder on everybody than when I was in France. The distance, the feeling of borrowed time have taken their toll in between my family and I. And the story in between me and my dad is a complicated one, broken up in pieces: the happy childhood, the months long business travel where he would live in another country for most of the year. Then, the divorce with my mom and his very long abscence during, well, all of my teenage years really. He is not an easy person to live with either. And then his wife, of course.
And all I heard for 10 days, Marie can you do this, Marie-Laure what do you think, can I, where are we going today, what are we doing today, mama, mama, mama.
The visit went ok. Definitly better than I thought it would, but I'm relieved they are gone now. Silly me who thought I'd finally have some time for myself. Instead the 3 people I live with have filled every single day to the brim with their stuff, that of course require assistance from me. I'm getting desperate and I don't know how to approach life anymore. I'm hopelessly behind at that point. Even if I worked every hour of every day I'd not make it. And I'm happy to steal 2 small ones crunched up in between all the other stuff. I'm feeling rushed and I stare at my pile of beads and thread and nothing is coming. Instead there is a maelstrom of dates and times twirling and twirling. Ugh. I need to sleep.
But like Hiro says: tomorrow is another day.
3 comments:
you need sleep and relaxation, really.
You need to get rid of this stress you had for 10 days, 10 days that required 100% of you attention. And on top of that it was emotionally intense, from what you say.
I think you "simply" need to load your batteries again.
Like for me today, I feel exhausted and a bit empty like you. I did not sleep well at all in the past days, and even if life's not easy, always, when the batteries are empty, the world around does not look as it is really.
Soooo, my advice: put your beads on the table near. Give them a rest ;-)
Tomorrow will be another day, you'll get motivated, inspired with working batteries inside ;-)
(and I'm going to do the same, I put my paintings and pens away for a day!)
huggggs
Candy Froggie:
Thank you for all your good words my friend :). I'm feeling a bit less stressed...sadly no sleep for me either...what's going on here? You too? Pffff...we could both go to the caribbean to sip some rhum, no?
Hugs to you!
Did you just say "caribbean" and "rum"?!! (packing luggage here :P)
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